To most people, divorce is a last resort. It’s the best possible solution when a marriage has deteriorated to the point of imploding. It is considered the only viable option left when all other options have been exhausted. But the decision to sever the connection permanently is still a difficult one. Many couples remain hopeful that they can somehow reconcile their differences and repair their marriages. Unfortunately, many of them find that the time and effort spent doing so is wasted.
In this article, we’ll discuss symptoms of a failing marriage that indicate it is time to consider divorce. Not all of the following signs will be evident in your own circumstances. But if you recognize a few of them, it may be time to make a difficult decision.
Your Spouse Is Addicted To Drugs Or Alcohol
Drug and alcohol addiction can be overwhelming for the spouse of an addict. No amount of love, patience, or understanding will cure the addiction since it is perpetuated by chemical changes that have taken place in the brain. Meanwhile, the behaviors of the addict can become aggravating and even destructive as the substance of abuse takes priority over everything else.
Unless an addict is willing to seek professional help, he or she is unlikely to change. Moreover, even with treatment, the addiction is lifelong, and thus will be a constant struggle. Staying in the marriage may prove harmful for the entire family.
All Attempts To Save Your Marriage Have Failed
When your marriage is in trouble, there are many steps you can take to save it. You can try to talk with your spouse in an attempt to resolve differences. If your partner is unwilling to talk, you can confront him or her about specific behaviors you consider unacceptable. Doing so gives the person an opportunity to explain himself or herself, and if necessary, to make changes. You can also attend marriage counseling.
If these attempts fail, and your spouse continues to act in a manner you consider offensive, it may be time to call it quits. Staying in the marriage will likely cause more frustration, stress, and resentment.
You Hold Different Values And Beliefs
The values people hold and belief systems they subscribe to can form a powerful bond between them. They can hold marriages together that might otherwise erode due to other pressures and stresses. When those values and beliefs differ, however, the bonds shared between a husband and wife can quickly unravel.
For example, you may be Mormon while your spouse is Christian. You might be a dedicated member of the Democratic Party while your spouse is a dedicated member of the Republican party. You may favor a traditional sexual relationship in a marriage while your spouse favors predilections that border on deviant.
The point is that different values and belief systems are difficult to overcome in a marriage. If they are causing resentment to grow between you and your spouse, and neither party is willing to cede ground, divorce may be the best solution.
Your Spouse Has Cheated
Infidelity is one of the most common reasons married couples divorce. Many people assume that once their spouse cheats, he or she is likely to cheat again down the road. The trust in the relationship is broken, and thus the marriage must end. Some spouses forgive their partners for their affairs, hoping it will never happen again. Unfortunately, their hope is often misplaced.
If your husband or wife has been unfaithful, it’s time to consider getting a divorce. Talk with him or her first. Find out whether your partner can refrain from cheating in the future. If you suspect he or she will be unable to, hire a divorce attorney.
There are many other signs that may indicate divorce is the best option given your circumstances. From physical abuse and emotional abuse to financial distress due to gambling debts, parting ways with your spouse may protect you and your kids from danger and despair.